Heartbreaking love? -The problem of the unique Love

Why do we suffer heartbreaking love? 

What function of love makes us so upset when we lose it? The unique love is the feature of true love. It is something that you never find the same with another person in a relationship. The irreplaceable nature of love makes love extremely tragic when we leave it behind after possessing it.

"The highest function of love is that it makes the loved one a unique and irreplacable being."- Tom Robbins

The most distinctive feature that separates love from friendship is the exclusiveness of love. We may like many people at the same time, but we could only love one person at one time if it is true love in a romantic relationship. After all, love is possessive. If our lover is replaceable, we will not fully commit ourselves to that person only, for we will get easily distracted by other love interests. Without devoted passion for the loved one, we could easily get lost in a jungle of misunderstandings because to perceive the fine-tune of love, we need to be absorbed by love completely. We would have turned to different directions or hit on two diverted roads when we had a slight distraction in some critical moment.

Love starts from fuzzy feelings and colored with rosy fantasy. After we approach the romantic interest, we see the real contour of the person who is in love with us. We will get mixed feelings for likes and dislikes. No one in the world fully satisfies our fantasy in love. However, something in substance keeps dragging two hearts together because of the irresistible of the desire to get together, and no one can live without the other. For the urgency of togetherness, each of the two is willing to sacrifice part of self in order to obtain a more complete sense of self. That is true love because no one else could take the place of that unique position in each other's heart.

Heartbreaking love happens when the two persons could not merge into one no matter how hard they have tried and the very unique feature of each other remains strong as ever. It is a dilemma where they cannot move on and cannot linger more. The only situation is suffering heartbreaking love as being swamped in a walled pond.